Day 23 of 100 days of gratitude:

So today my sister came home from the nursing home. She is so happy. yay!

I was able to at last connect my laptop to the store so I am back in business and can maintain and edit the store... yay!

and Yay! 

Day 22 of 100 days of gratitude:

My sister gets to come home tomorrow! yay!!! 

Day 21 of 100 days of gratitude:

Today I am grateful that my new employer is going to cover the background check as I have no money. I am also grateful for some awesome tech support guys with my server who helped me to start downloading the many files that control my store so that hopefully I will not have to do a lot of rebuild to start site maintenance again. yay! 

Day 20 of 100 days of gratitude:

I am grateful that today i was finally given a job. It's part time but should be amazing. I will be teaching autistic children in their homes. Everything from colors and basic skills to social skills and behavior management. Yay! I am so excited. Wish this was something that I could make full time and regular. I so can't wait to get started. It's for a company called Aptitude Habilitation Services. I so can't wait to get started. 
http://www.aptitudeservices.com/

Day 19 of 100 days of gratitude:

Sleep

Day 18 of 100 days of gratitude:

I am grateful for many things today. I have not been here for a while. Did a show last weekend, 4 days. Thursday through Sunday. Had a blast! Good sales. Got to see a lot of really great friends. 

Came home Sunday night and found out that my laptop and all accessories were stolen right out of my living room. While my dog and mom slept. Everyone was ok except my computer which of course contains seriously my entire life including all store data, newsletters, everything. Job search info... Everything and more was on that computer. Not only did they take my computer, they also took the external... the back up hard drive where everything was backed up. So, after freaking out, and I mean totally freaking out for the night, the next day I went to Aaron's, where we already have an account because of my washer and dryer, and they set me up with no problems at all ~ no payments until Oct. 1. Yay! So I have this really cool new computer now to play leading me to my first " am grateful for Aaron's and the really amazingly nice and understanding people who work there."

So I come home and am exhausted. Figured, long long weekend of way to much fun. Stolen laptop, intruders in my house. Way to much stress so I go to bed figuring I will be better tomorrow. Well, so much for that. I end up so sick. By morning by hair hurts, my big toenail hurts, I can't hardly move but if i don't move, I hurt. What's going on. And my throat! Ugh! can't swallow anything. Horrible. So I dig out my nasty sore throat stuff... garlic, cayenne, honey yucky stuff. After about 5 doses I throw it up. this isn't working. Evening of day two I am so done. I have to go see someone. So, I call around, find a new clinic here in town that is open until 10pm, Valley View, and off we go. This brings me to my second "I am grateful for the Valley View Clinic." I get there, find out that I qualify for a $20 co pay, and now that is my co pay for the next year. So I kinda have an insurance policy. Yay! So I get to see the doctor. They give me penicillin and send me home. Yay! Now I can get a few other things taken care of and will be able to afford it this year, things that I won't mention here but has to be done by the end of this year. Yay! I also find out that there is a dental plan also that I will be checking into next week. yay!

There is more that has gone on during the sick busy week but i will leave those things until another day, until they have played out, to see if there is another grateful in there... Love and light to you all... Blessings be bountiful in your lives and in your hearts.  

Day 17 of 100 days of gratitude:

Well, while yesterday morning was kinda bad, it all turned out good. Made rent at the show yesterday...  Got to see a lot of friends from the events last year and made some new friends too. What a sweetheart Shade is, decided I had to meet his family. He spent the day running errands for me and such. So cute.
I am thankful today that the Goddess has supplied me with the means and customers to do what I need to do this weekend to get back on track. :-) 

I don't think i can post anything today as far as gratitude. I went to my show and set up where my friends were suppose to meet me so that Renee could run the store so I could go to the interview. They never showed up. Unemployment, after a week of telling me I was approved, denied my benefits. I have a job interview in Renton tomorrow and no money to get there. No unemployment and and over drawn checking account. I am not sure what I ever did but I would really like to be done paying whatever it was back. 

Show this weekend

I am going to be away from everything for a few days, show this weekend in a field where I will not have access to the internet. Will be back on Monday. :-) 

Day 17 of 100 days of gratitude:

I forgot to post yesterday so here it is. I went and applied to start college classes in the fall for a new bachelors degree that will hopefully help me find a job. Then after getting home, late at night, i got a call for Renton School District. They want to interview me but my references had not come in. So, they are in and now I will hopefully get a job for this year. And it's up north! would be amazing! 

Day 16 of 100 days of gratitude:

I guess I am grateful that I got out of bed this morning. Today, that is about it. 

Day 15 of 100 days of gratitude:

Today, as always, I am grateful for good friends who are willing to step up when needed. I am grateful for a supportive wonderful family in my facebook group who are also willing to jump in and step up when needed. They take such good care of each other.

I am thankful for the sunshine today.

I am thankful for my studies to keep my mind off the problems of the day.

I am thankful for an understanding landlord who is willing to help in any way he can by giving me time.

For a day that started out rough, I am very thankful it ended up ok.

My studies in Druidry

Today I read chapter 3 in the new book and found it fascinating. It discusses tools used in Druid magic and tries to talk about the origins of the tools, some newer and some ancient from what can be told from history. 

A Druid Wand

The Druids have something called Dragon Wands. A dragon wand, difficult to come by, are wands discovered and created from a branch naturally wrapped in vine. For example, if the wood is hazel, it would be called the Hazel Dragon, Oak would be the Oak Dragon. Kinda cool but the book points out that it can take years to find one of these if one is found at all. For example, to find one in Western Washington, you would probably need to plant an ivy near a tree to grow yourself and see what happens. 

You can also use any other type of wand though a natural one that is hand made is preferred. My wand below is a piece of root that literally jumped out and tripped me - twice. I was walking in the small forest of Dash Point State Park a beautiful tropical like forest in Federal Way, WA when this lovely root jumped up and tripped me, It wasn't attached to anything though it had not been detached long, it was still very green. I picked it up out of the trail and moved it off to the side so someone else wasn't going to trip on it. So, I continued me walk with Ziggi, my dog, down to the beach. On the way back, there it was, again in the trail tripping me up. So, it went home with me. It sat on my shelves for 6 months before I decided what to do with it, before it spoke to me again. It then became this wand. Since these pics were taken, I lost the amethyst in the point which has been replaced with another using wire wrapping as in the picture far below. 

Rod
The rod also sometimes a staff, is used to map out or measure out the sacred space, the protect circle used for any particular ritual. It's planted firmly in the ground and the circle, square, or area is measured at specific times of the day using the sun to draw an exact circle or shape. The measurements are taken  at the high point of each direction to create perfect measurements of right angles. It is also said that this was done in conjunction with the Druid Cord, described below, for accurate measurements. This rob brought protection to the sacred area.

I searched but could not find a picture of this. Will add one when I finish mine. My apple wood is currently drying so that it doesn't split when I start to decorate it. 

Cord

The Druid Cord is a cord made of some sacred strong, un-stretching, naturally sacred material, divided into 12 sections by colors, knots, or beads, used to measure also. Said to sometime be used in conjunction with the rod. It is also said that these could be the cords worn around the waist in the old  drawings of Druids passed down through history.

Druid Egg

The Druid Egg is a stone or piece of glass kept close to help with focus. I would compare it most closely to a worry stone. It's round or egg shapes, small enough to keep with you in your crane bag (to be discussed in a few) or your pocket or purse and is held and focus on to help when you are feeling anxious or when there is a decision that needs to be made and great focus is needed. 

Druid Sickle

Some places you may read that the Druids used sickles to harvest mistletoe from the trees, that it was held sacred and used in ritual. Archaeologists have found that mistletoe did not enter Ireland until recent times and that unless put there purposely, mistletoe is not generally found in Britain even now. 

However the, sickle has been  used since ancient times to harvest grains and herbs. It is said that a gold sickle may have been used as it was thought to be pure and holy and that it did not need cleaned. However, a pure gold sickle would not have been usable as the metal is to soft. It would have maybe been gold plated over brass or just been brass shined to resemble gold. 

Using a sickle to cut herbs and grains can help to be connected with the ancients. I would say that this is not a necessarily important tool unless you feel connected to it. 

Incidentally, i do carry the last one in my store... ;-)

http://www.lifesmysticaljourney.com/Athames.html

Druid Robe

Robes worn by the ancients were probably made from wool or leather. The book talks about colors and such of the tartans in Ireland and Scotland, how the different colors represent families and such. While interesting, i really didn't see it's importance here. 

The wearing of a robe for ceremonial purposes is a popular but from this text, didn't seem to be absolutely necessary. If you do decide that it's something you would like to do, it would be appropriate to make it from wool directly from the sheep or leather directly from the animal, thanks given or course for the gift. More often then not in these modern times, this is not possible so whatever you can get works, just make sure you stay natural and give thanks to whatever plant or animal has given for your robe. 

Crane Bag

I little additional info about the crane bag... 

According to the book "The Bardic Handbook', by Kevin Manwaring:
"Fionn Mac Cumhail, that great culture hero of Erin, was given a bag made from crane-skin - the crane, or heron, being a divinatory bird sacted to the Druids - it's legs in flight were said to have suggested teh Ogham alphabet. Fionn obtained it from his father by 'skill and cunning'. As a child Fionn was saved from death by his grandmother, who, in the form of a crane (heron) carried him off to a great tree, where he remained protected. The crane bag was said to have been made from the skin of the enchantress Aoife, who had been transformed into a crane for two hundred years as punishment by Bov the Red, King of the Tuatha de Danann. She was the childless second wife of Lir (father of the sea-god Manannan) and filled with jealousy for his first wifes four children, planned to slay them, but instead turned them into white swans (the Children of LIr). When her crime was discovered, she herself was enchanted inot a 'witch of the air', in the form of a crane."

From what I gather in the book, the term 'crane bag' has become more of an expression than a literal interpretation (cranes/herons may even be protected, and not available for 'bagging', pardon the pun!). It seems that it is merely the term for any bag which contains the 'trinkets' that help you do your bardic arts.

Day 14 of 100 days of gratitude:

Today at the end of my day I am grateful that my sister is healing well and that she is happy where she is. We all can't wait until she comes home but at least where she is is livable. 

My studies in Druidry

Recently along with my studies with OBOD, I started reading the book Druid Magic. I am enjoying it so much. A couple nights ago I read a section on setting wards. They describe a simple effect way to start simply and it's wonderful, effective, and so easy. 
First you visualize what you want to put the wards around. A bed, a car, a house, etc. See the area and visualize moving from corner to corner labeling that as black, white, black white to give the vision power. After visualizing your box, you see it being protected in every way. Do not visualize or conjure what is giving the protection. Allow it to come on it's own. Whatever is needed at that moment to protect is what will give itself to you and appear. It was amazing. The first night I set up wards around my own bed and the beds of my grown children, one of which is in Idaho and the other in Alaska. So, I ended up being protected by my totem, the raven/crows. Its was amazing, four of them, one at each corner. My daughter got black panther stalking around  her bed. Sure her boyfriend appreciates that, hee hee. And my son's was strange, he got a billowing mass of color hanging over and around his bed kind of swirling around. 

The second night, we put wards again around my own and my children's beds, my mom's bed, and my sister's bed who is in the hospital right now fighting an infection.  I again got my ravens/crows, my daughter her big cat, my son this time had a bear, my mom got a panther like Sharaya, and my Sister had a dragon, which is like her favorite thing in the world. I think my own thoughts may have helped that one along a bit. I am looking forward to trying this in other ways also. 

Once upon a time

Once upon a time, there was a flicker of light. A flicker of light that sparkled so brightly that you could not help but notice it. The flicker was the spark of love. 

As it moved throughout its days looking for a place to rest, it saw a lonely young man wandering through time. Wandering through time looking for something, he did not know what. He just knew it was something he knew he needed to find. 

It thought, now there is a place to rest. I will come back if I don't find another place soon. 

As it moved on through the world, it noticed a girl, pretty with red curls and green eyes. She was sitting quietly under a tree writing in a book. "To love and be loved" she murmured and wrote as a lonely smile spread across her mouth. 


As the light moved behind the girl to see the book, it was amazing to see the drawing, the drawing of the lonely young man. Under the picture was the caption, the man of my dreams. 

Awe, thought the light as she thought back through her days. Awe she thought again as she remembered the lonely young man wandering through time. Awe it thought is it looked at the little red headed girl writing quietly in her book. 

With a tap on the page of the book, next to the scribbling pencil, it caught the attention of the pretty red haired girl. Bouncing in the air in front her her, the light prompted her to follow.

Glowing brightly, it moved back through the world to the place where it left the lonely young man, often looking behind to make sure the girl still followed. She did, book in hand, pencil curled into her hair. 

When she saw him, she dropped her book. It fell open to the page where her drawing was. He looked at it, picked it up, looked at her and smiled. A tear on his cheek, he asked her her name. Their hands touched, and then they knew. He knew he had found what he had been looking for. She knew he was the man of her dreams. They knew they would never again be apart. 

Day 13 of 100 days of gratitude:

Today I am grateful for the fact that I know that with a little time and internal reflection, i can cure myself and bring myself back to the person i want to be. It's been a rough couple of weeks, summer, year, and couple of years and today everything just seemed to catch up with me. Ugh! I just wanted to sleep all day long. 

How?

how do you tell someone
how you feel
when you don't know
how they feel
and can't find a way
to ask the questions
that pull at your heart
causing your mind
to question what you feel.
by Journey 08/10/212

Day 12 of 100 days of gratitude:

Today I am grateful for the sunshine outside, warn weather but not to hot, a roof over my head... my family and my wonderful new friend!!! 

When the time comes

When the time comes
to know what to know
you find yourself
wondering when you
will find a way
to tell others
how to reach their
greatest goals
to be successful
to not give up
to know that the time
is coming when all
will be ok
and you will survive
that is given you
as long as you have
the often hidden
courage to move
forward endlessly
never stopping
never knowing
always wondering
if you will be.
By Journey
08/09/2012

Thanking my Goddess

Yes, today I am thanking my Goddess. She came through and the first of my unemployment was deposited into my account this morning. The phone bill is paid and next week we should be able to pay the rest of the bills. So excited. I actually cried this morning when I saw the  money in my checking account. Cried and woke my mom up. I was so relieved and excited. Maybe tonight I will actually sleep peacefully the night through.



I decided to write tonight. To have poetry come from me... well, it doesn't happen often. But, tonight, this is what it is. Love

It fills you from the inside out

your heart hurts, your spirit soars

confusion in knowledge

forgetting how your feelings

knowing what you can't remember

feelings flowing

contacts bringing light

and shadow to a world

where aloneness thrives

and peace touches

you a way that

turns you inside out

as you remember to forget

never knowing

how to learn

the way he feels.

written by Journey

08/09/2012

Day 11 of 100 days of gratitude:

I got my unemployment today! I got my unemployment today! I am grateful that I am taken care of and that I finally got my unemployment! Now to find a job. Let the upward trend continue!!!

Day 10 of 100 days of gratitude:

Today I am thankful for a hospital that is taking good care of my sister, not sending her home before she is ready and is making sure that she is put into a recovery home where she will be taken care of.

I am also thankful for her grateful boys who are being so kind to her and making sure that she knows that they miss her.

I am thankful that I have someone to look forward too... 

Day 9 of 100 days of gratitude:

Today I faxed two appeals with unemployment. One for my summer denial and the other for the over payment that I really do not have. So, after following the instructions of the person on the phone this morning, I faxed over the papers and this afternoon I got a call from a wonderful woman who is handling the paperwork for the over payment. It's already being taken care of. She was great, explained well how it will work, and it's all being taken care of. Yay! 

So now if only they approve my benefits for the summer, that would be amazing! I am so confident that it will go through. Something right has to happen this summer. 

Today I am thankful for a woman who actually does her job and is taking care of my claim. 

Druidry in my life ~ now what?

I think alot about the things that I have learned even when I am not doing the studying I should be doing. I find myself applying what I know more and more in my everyday life, wondering what to do next, who should I talk to, why am I not finding a job, what can I do to open my store. I have a man whom I love, how do I know if he will feel the same about me. How can I help my children make better decisions then I did at their ages. How can I help my mom to live a happy full life now at the end of her years. These are all things that I think about constantly in my day to day life. 

I am not afraid of death and growing old any longer. I do not exactly embrace it but feeling that I have a grasp of where I am going most definitely helps. They tell me that when you are good in your life, your next if you so choose will be better. My next life is going to be amazing. I have fought so hard for a good life and have spent it in constant struggle. I try to stay a peace with it, think that my time is coming. I am a good person, do for others without expectations for myself. But I am so tired. I do not want a lot, am not asking for the world. I would like to have love, someone to spend my days with and I would like to be able to do it in peace. To do what I want to do, to travel, to work to pay my way, and to enjoy what I do. I became a teacher, what I had always wanted to do. Now I can't do this as I cannot find a job. I have my store, my own business. Something my ex talked about doing but  never did. i did it and it is going reasonably well considering. My teaching tell me that what goes out comes back three fold and that my time is coming. Friends have done readings for me and they all say that my time is coming, easier times are in my future but that they road there is difficult and there will be struggle. Gee, not sure if I can handle struggle. Because that has never been part of my life. 

Over the past three years, there has been a someone in my life who I fell for though I should not have. I got to spend a year sharing a wall with him, listening to him work with his students, listen to music on the smart board, doing his work. We talked, got to know each other, and learned a little about each other. Now, his situation, that I knew was going to change though I tried hard to forget it, has changed and I am not sure how I fit in now. I know how I feel, not real sure about how he feels, and know that he is in no way close to feeling like me as he is coming out of a long marriage. What do I do with this? I am not sure, controlling myself, letting him lead though that is difficult. Trying not to touch to much (learned and probably should have known that he is not used to this). And... here I am writing about him in my blog... I just gave him the link to this yesterday. stupid me. If he reads this? Well, I guess I will be embarrassed, lol... Well, he knows how I feel I think so it's probably nothing new. 

And now I sit here, 12:32 in the morning thinking why am I here. I should be in bed. A friend gave me a job cleaning for him so that I can maybe get my unemployment. They are still fighting me on it but going to try anyway. Such a sweetheart, says he will pay me since they are still denying me. So tomorrow I will finish unpacking his apartment and get it cleaned up. Fun stuff... Anyway, headed to bed. Enjoy. Promise will have some actually Druidry stuff to write about next time. 

Day 8 of 100 days of gratitude:

Today I was thankful for the warm sun outside and the sales that are enabling me to pay my bills this month. 

Day 7 of 100 days of gratitude:

Today I am thankful that we found a hospital with caring people who are taking good care of my sister in her time of need. They diagnosed her, performed the needed surgery and she is on her way to recovery all within about 12 hours. Yay and thank you Capital Medical Center of Olympia, WA...

Day 6 of 100 days of gratitude:

I am thankful that I have found out that I can still truly love someone. 

Day 5 of 100 days of gratitude:

Today I am grateful for someone who shows a great interest in me. :-)   can't say more then that. :-) 

Day 4 of 100 days of gratitude:

I a grateful for my daughter who cheered me up this morning and a good friend who is trying hard to keep my spirits up while I am so unbelievably stressed. 


Today I am also very grateful for friends. So many have stepped up to help us in these difficult times. I have had three orders in the last 24 hours and a friend, a very sweet friends, has created a company just so that he can hire me to help him. This will hopefully allow me to collect my unemployment and make it so that I can pay my bills and at least keep from getting further behind. Today, despite the fact that again I did not get my job, I am  blessed with loving friends and family. Thank you!